Teen Dating Violence

Am I Abusing My Girlfriend/Boyfriend?

Do You:

Call your girlfriend/boyfriend names or put her/him down?
Belittle your girlfriend/boyfriend in front of other people?
Check up on your girlfriend/boyfriend through text messages/phone calls to see where she/he is or who she/he is with

Tell your girlfriend/boyfriend what kind of clothes/make up she/he can wear?
Keep your girlfriend/boyfriend away from her/his friends?
Keep your girlfriend/boyfriend away from her/his family?
Have to know where your girlfriend/boyfriend is and who she/he is with all the time?
Insist that you spend all your time together?
Check up on your girlfriend/boyfriend at home? Work? School?
Insist that your girlfriend/boyfriend carry a cell phone so you can reach her/him?
Become angry if you can’t reach your girlfriend/boyfriend?
Threaten to hurt your girlfriend/boyfriend? Her friends? Family? Pets?
Deny your controlling/abusive behavior?
Minimize your physical abuse? “I only shoved you.”
Force girlfriend/boyfriend to do things? Alcohol? Drugs? Sex?
Tell your girlfriend/boyfriend the abuse is her/his fault? She/he made you do it?
Threaten to break up with her/him if she/he doesn’t do what you want?
Threaten to hurt yourself or others if she/he breaks up with you?

If you answered “yes” to one or more of the above, you may want to speak with a counselor at your school, talk with your parents or another trusted adult, or call your local domestic violence service provider; NYS Domestic and Sexual Violence Hotline at 1.800.942.6906 or TTY 1.800.818.0656, to talk with someone there about dating violence and/or visit the following websites for more information: